i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
