Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Naked Twister starts at high noon
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
