If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize