didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
