just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
