You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Randomize
