Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
