....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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