i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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