I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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