Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Randomize
