he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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