No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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