He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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