if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
