Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize