I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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