Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
