At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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