you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
