big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
