she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
