You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
