I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
