in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
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