so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her๏ปฟ
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ๐๐๐๐
Randomize
