no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
