its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
