at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
