Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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