Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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