If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
