he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
