plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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