He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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