the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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