I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
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