I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
