shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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