1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
