I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
