I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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