Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
