I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize
