When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
