Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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