do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
