remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
