Ambien. No doubt about it.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
