i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
