We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
