yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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